Interesting times

Friday, October 17, 2008
Interesting times

My description of the ancient Chinese curse "may you live in interesting times" was met by complete bafflement by YF today; followed by an even greater degree of bafflement as I tried to explain to her that it had probably originated in the imagination of some British writer in the 19th century. Wikipedia kind of sorted out the communication breakdown, but it could not, unfortunately, do anything to help the situation that had caused me to mention the curse in the first place.

Following the discovery of his illicit trip to China by the hospital administration, Prof. N. has resigned his position at the clinic. I must admit that my first response was to try and think of any occasion where I might have let slip that he was not in fact suffering from a sore knee (which in itself is a fairly rubbish excuse for two weeks absence, although maybe its very rubbishness was its [potential] genius), but was instead doing his cross-cultural selfhood thing in Beijing. I should have seen this coming of course - the idea that anything that I set out to do could proceed entirely smoothly is, apparently, ridiculous.

As he intended to leave the clinic around the time that his contract will now finish anyway I am not overly concerned about the impact on his plan in life, whatever that may be. It does, however, have the potential to influence the chances of being taken on by the Universities that he had been in negotiation with, which in turn influences where I will end up (obedient doctoral shadow that I am). This worries me. Quite what options are open to me should this turn out to be somewhere rubbish I don't know.

The blow of this news was tempered rather by the sight of a man in the street sporting a sublime mullet and moustache combination. Always speaking English in the lab can almost make me forget that I am living in Germany, but sights such as these bring it back to me in a most enjoyable fashion.   

I hold out hopes that my German classes will go miraculously and allow me to speak to the people around me, but deep down I know that this is unrealistic. The most obvious barrier to this is my inherent rubbishness at languages; but on top of that is my complete hopelessness at actually speaking to people, regardless of what language that might be in. Still, perhaps the relative anonymity of arriving in a new country will allow me to realise that I am allowed to be whoever I want to be, and so can overcome this crippling insularity.

Still, attending the German class has resulted in me meeting a few people, with varying degrees of success. Going for a pint with Tom was a welcome event; allowing me to meet MV, who will probably be useful contact (and although a bit of a dick in parts, and a minor enemy of Prof. N's, is probably fundamentally a good person to know). It also allowed me to strike The Lion off my list of pubs in Magdeburg to visit; although my loud explanation of neo-Nazism and the rise of the Right in Europe for Tom probably helped strike me off their list of welcome people anyway.

Most useful (that is the wrong adjective, but will do until we see how things pan out), however, has been my contact with Z - her invitation to an album launch night tomorrow evening is definitely a positive development. That it stemmed from my rather piteous description of my lonely circumstances is by the by. I do of course dislike myself for seeing it as an opportunity to meet the people that she knows and see if they are worth latching onto; but when one is newly arrived in a strange country surely such behaviour becomes less wrong? No? Besides such mercenary thoughts she is, of course, a charming girl (Woman? Lady? Is one meant to alter how one refers to others as time goes by? I am after all probably described as a man by unfamiliar others, regardless of the fact that my inner self continues in its teenage rut.) with whom I hope some form of friendship outwith the professional can develop. That this band evening clashes with the one other thing that I have been invited to is most unfortunate.

What I am writing has now definitely deviated from the title of the post and has become entirely uninteresting, and so I will stop.